Instead of always trying to fix things, realise you deserve better.
Stop waiting for change. Make the change. Be the change.
You don’t need to FIX yourself. You are beautiful, loved and special just the way you are.
But you know something doesn’t feel right. Something is missing.
You blame your body.
You blame the food you eat.
You blame someone else for making you feel this way.
You blame the weather.
You blame a friend.
You blame the money.
You blame anyone or anything else for your feelings.
I used to do this. It was always someone else’s fault.
And then one day I woke up.
Well, it was more of a gradual awakening really.
I realised that I have complete and total responsibility for my own well-being. If I feel frustrated, sad, lonely, irritated, self-conscious, un-loved and un-special, then only I have the power to change that.
Every moment of every day, we have a choice.
And sometimes we’ll make the wrong choices – we are human after all.
I believe that even the wrong choices are the right ones because they give us a greater learning curve or send us on a journey to help us learn a specific lesson.
After all, we’ve all dated that guy we really shouldn’t have dated. We knew it wouldn’t work. We knew we’d get hurt. But we did it anyway.
And in dating the wrong guy it helped us reinforce exactly who the RIGHT guy is.
We’ve all done this with food too. Spent a whole holiday eating and drinking all the things we know our bodies can’t handle. But we’re ‘on holiday’, ‘life’s too short’, ‘everyone else does it so why shouldn’t I?’… Falling off the wagon can be a useful path too in learning exactly what does make our bodies feel really GOOD.
Remember that time you did that clean eating plan for a month? Remember how good you felt? Remember that time you had a personal trainer for six months and got the toned, fit body you dreamed of?
Take all those experiences and think about the times you felt REALLY GOOD in your life.
(And guess what? Some of those times when you were loving life may not have been your skinniest or when you were eating the ‘right’ food. It might have been when you just let go, embraced who you were and allowed experiences and love to take over!)
Grab some paper and a pen (or use your phone if you prefer) and write down:
1. The times in your life when you felt happiest. Include as much detail as possible. Where were you living, how old were you, what made you feel so happy/loved/special? What was your daily routine like? What kind of food did you eat? Did you do daily exercise? Were you learning a new skill? Who were you with? Try to bring the images to life with smells, colours, songs and words.
2. Now write down all the things that are good in your life NOW. Like a gratitude list if you like. All the things that make you happy and feel great.
3. What does your daily routine look like at the moment? Is that something that’s making you happy? Or is it causing you stress and fatigue? Write down all the good points of your daily routine; all the stuff you want to keep.
4. Now think about how you want to FEEL every day. Loved, nourished, special? Write a list of at least 10 words that describe how you wish to feel.
5. Next to each of those words, write down ways in which you can ensure that feeling happens every, single day. (Write in the present tense as if you’re already doing it)
E.g. I want to feel loved: I treat myself lovingly. I buy myself flowers. I wear my favourite colours. I wrap myself up in a warm blanket on the sofa. I spend time with my pets.
The final step is, of course, to take some action!
Ensure you treat yourself well every day so that you always feel loved/ special/ happy/ nourished/ appreciated …
Making a simple switch from a slice of toast and an instant coffee to making a fresh fruit smoothie or preparing a pretty oat bowl the night before will make so much difference to the start of your day.
Find the things that work for you, that fit in to your lifestyle/budget/family/values and that make you feel AMAZING!
Have a wonderful day!