Healing the heart space is one of the scariest things we can do.
Because right now I’m scared.
Scared to open up and be vulnerable in a way I’ve never been before. I know my coach is going to ask me questions that will be uncomfortable – painful even. It’s going to be a bumpy ride.
But if I don’t do it I will stay here.
Forever in a place of ‘not quite enough’; a silent haunting that weaves its way through all aspects of life.
When I think about how I’ll feel once we start our coaching journey together I breathe a huge sign of relief. A full, long breath that forces my shoulders to relax and allows my heart to open a little wider.
My eyes begin to well up with tears.
I know that my coach will trigger emotions from deep within me that I have to deal with in order to move forward, rise to the next level and achieve all of my life’s goals and desires.
You see, having an open heart isn’t just about being an animal lover, a kind, compassionate human being or a loving, tactile parent. Having an open heart is about being able to dig really deep into the darkest parts of your soul and to allow those fears to surface; to shine such a bright light on them that they no longer haunt your every thought.
I’m ready to do the inner work and feel the love of the Universe radiate from deep within me. I’m ready to be courageous even through times of fear and uncertainty. I’m ready to choose vulnerable and feminine each time my masculine ego kicks in to take me back to where I’ve always been.
After all, as Albert Einstein said: ‘We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.’
However cliché it may sound, it’s time for me to step outside of my comfort zone.
I cannot evolve if I stay where it’s comfortable and safe.
It’s time to take a risk and know that the Universe is always there to support me.
If I’m feeling this way, chances are that you might feel this way too.
You KNOW you’re ready to step up your game in life, love or business but there are always excuses…
And when a coach (or friend, lover, parent or child) calls you out on your excuses, it’s as if you have an out of body experience where you can hear the words spewing from your mouth but in your heart you know they’re not true.
That’s why people trigger us when they call us out on our bullsh*t! We sometimes take it to heart as a negative judgement or harsh criticism because, ultimately, the truth hurts.
Now is the time to take that hurt and turn it into something that can bloom and grow into the life and love you’ve always dreamed of.
I have faith that the Universe will support me every step of the way.
All it takes is that first step.
To set the intention.
To say ‘YES, I’m ready!’
(At this point the Universe will probably throw its head back, laugh out loud and say ‘about time too!’)
I’m scared, but I’m ready.
May 2021 update! Over two years since writing this post and I’m so grateful to myself for taking the time to do the inner work and to ask for (and invest energetically and financially in) the support I needed in peeling back the layers, exposing the wounds and beginning to heal.
If you’re reading this now and have only just begun your healing journey and it feels really tough, please don’t give up! Every day, in some small way, you’ll be making a difference to your future and all those small changes really do add up.
Yes it’s scary. Yes it can sometimes be very painful and lead to tears, tantrums and difficult conversations. But ultimately, you’re giving yourself the greatest gift by investing in yourself, doing the inner work needed to heal and transform and to show up in the world as the brightest, most luminous and happy version of you.
*Exciting news!* I’m now in the process of writing my book ‘Raising Wild Birds’, which will cover many aspects of personal growth and healing, weaving together my personal stories with intuitive guidance to help people connect to their inner truth, follow their heart and start living a wildly fulfilling life. My book will be published with The Unbound Press early in 2022. Stay connected with me on Instagram if you’re interested in grabbing a copy!
Want to read more? I was so delighted to be part of an amazing curated book called #2020Vision – Unbound Perspectives From A Year Like No Other which was released in February 2021. It’s a collection of short stories, diary extracts and poems from (awesome!) female writers sharing their perspectives and experiences of 2020. Some are happy, some are sad, some are traumatic, some are romantic, but all share beautiful insights, lightbulb moments and opportunities for growth that would not have been achieved to the same degree without the global pandemic.
Buy your paperback copy or Kindle/e-reader version here: